Sometimes someone will say something to you that makes think about something in a very different way. If you are really listening, and open to hearing what they say, you will find yourself pondering the thought and contemplating its meaning.  And, you never really know who that person will be or when he or she will say it. Most of the time it just seems to happen, as if by accident.

I remember when I first started dating my boyfriend Joe. He stopped by my house when I was not home and left beautiful flowers in my door. It was a simple bouquet of red flowers to say, I was thinking of you. But the act made my day.

I was so excited I was grinning ear to ear as I walked on campus at Temple University where I teach once a week as an adjunct professor. My friend, Mr. Martin, a campus security guard, and I talk all the time. He calls me sunshine, and we always engage in conversation on my way to class.  There is something special about our interaction. I am not sure what it is, I just know that we both smile when we see each other and look forward to our brief exchanges.

On this day, I shared my story with him of how excited I was about Joe dropping flowers at my door and how wonderful and thoughtful it was.  After listening to me, Mr. Martin smiled, looked at me, and said, “Don’t get it confused. That is how it is supposed to be.”

I will never forget that line – that is how it is supposed to be!

I really gave it a lot of thought. Hmmmm…what about that comment stuck with me?

I know that whenever someone does anything unexpected and kind, it should be appreciated, valued and never taken for granted.

Was that what he meant by that comment?

My interpretation of the comment is this: we should all be treated with kindness and when someone shows you kindness we should remember that that is how it is suppose to be. We should not take kindness as a bonus in our everyday life; we should know that kindness is an integral ingredient in our everyday life.

This exchange will stick with me because I will always remember it – kindness should be expected and valued.

I get caught up in life like we all do. We forget what we want and that we deserve and should be treated with love, kindness and respect.

Are you being treated with kindness?

Are you in a healthy, kind relationship with yourself?

Think about your relationships? Are they filled with what you want and need?

red flowers